Yesterday was Sage's due date. It was kind of a sad day for me. I had hoped and prayed that her birth would not end in a C/S however it did. Now I am very great full for the good medical care that I received and that she was born healthy but it was not the birth I wanted. It was my best C/S overall, I had my great midwife Sylvia by my side as well as Todd, and great team of doctors and nurses that did all they could to make this experience a good one. They quickly brought Sage over to me after she was born for a cuddle and a kiss, and then she was brought to the recovery room to nurse. That was the best moment she was wide awake and alert and so beautiful. I will cherish that moment forever.
BUT it was a C/S. Will I ever get over not birthing a baby from my birth canal. I feel like I did not even birth my babies. One second I was pregnant 2:46 pm and then a moment later at 2:47 I had my third baby. I did not work for it. I felt helpless and not empowered. I felt robbed.
Now two weeks later I am mourning the experience that I will never have. And I am celebrating my Sage.
Thursday, August 2, 2007
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Monday, July 9, 2007
Some 37 week fun......
We gathered some paint.....
And got creative.....
Morgan could not quite reach the BUMP
But fun was had....
Maddie's hand print......It was fun.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Change is in the air
Well I am 36 weeks pregnant with my third daughter. Wow. I can't believe how quickly time has gone from seeing the two pink lines until today.
I remember holding Morgan in the hospital when she was about a week old, so tiny not even 5 pounds yet and I was thinking that I was not done, our family was not yet complete.
So now I sit here on a sweltering July evening in my almost quiet home alternating between issuing an eviction notice for my sweet daughter and hoping that I will go way overdue...because I am well aware of how our lives will change.
Many people seem fearful of that third child that somehow it is unbalanced and that it is one more than you have hands for. But hands are not near as important as heart and we have plenty of room to grow our hearts.
For me the first was hardest. The second was easier. What I found the hardest with the second was that my oldest no longer had me to herself. With this baby that will not be an issue as both kids are used to sharing. Although anyone who knows me know that our current "baby" will not adjust as easily as her big sister did. But she will and I have no doubt that she will so relish in the role of big sister.
So now I as a prepare for the arrival of my new baby I too am relishing my current position. And enjoying every second.
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